Splat champions interviewed

The churnal has delved deep the clique underworld of Splat, a game which originated on the sinclair spectrum. We have proudly located the two most prominent champions that have ever existed in the entire world. The formidable ADEYPOOP and the mysterious AF. These two players burst onto the scene in 2006 and still dominate the entire Top 10 of world record scores having dethroned Stompy and Kenty on their way to glory. Formerly favorite cousins, Adeypoop and AF are reputed to hate each others guts now the rivalry is so strong.

We spoke to AF first who told us of his anguish at being dethroned on that fateful day of 12 Oct 2006. "I don't want to talk about it" he said and turned his face away from us whilst sighing heavily. AF's skin glistened with sweat and emotion as finally he opened up like a river overflowing its banks. "I had been the champion ever since the 4th May 2006 when I reached level 23 and atained my score of 60690, STOMPY didn't know what hit him as my score totally blew him out of the water. Stompys' best was level 18 I think, it was one of the best times of my life when I reached number 1." Aaron was silent for a moment then continued... "That bastard, that fucking bastard! he was practising constantly and I never thought he'd do it but then he fucking well did and by that point I couldn't be arsed logging into Windows to play it anymore ...." AF turned away, the clock on the mantlepiece suddenly seeming to tick loudly in the uncomfortable silence that followed. Eventually Aaron broke the silence by muttering something about hating Microsoft and then started singing a little song he'd made up about Ubuntu.

Adeypoop, the reigning splat champion of the world was harder to track down having buggered off to the other side of the world but we did manage to get him on skype one morning. 'Every time i got close to his score that wee bugger seemed to pull another big one out the bag' said Ade whistfully, ' by big I mean really huge you know?' , Ade's kiwi accent sounded quite strong which surprised us. We couldn't tell at times what words he was saying for example he was pronouncing the vowels all wrong like saying beer feet instead of bare feet. Ade elaborated, "Then one day everything just seemed right and I went for it and I acheived it". Ade smiled a big smug grin and drank a large vodka martina shaken but not stirred in one gulp.

So what is in the future for these two giants of the computer world? Is there any truth in the rumours of a reunion playing Kick Off2? Aaron was quite frank in his response, 'I've moved on, yes splat is a proud part of my history, yes it hurts that adeypoop beat me, but i can hammer him at manic miner, TLL, assault cube... so he can fuck off. And I used to beat him as England versus Scotland in Kick Off2. He can have splat but I'll take everything else.

It was hard to tell what ade was saying due to all the jumbled up pronouciations but it seemed like he was bragging that noone will ever beat his score which has now stood for several years. Maybe he is right?

At this point Tony piped up, "I'm number one at the Atari ST version of Joust, the high score table i pinned on the wall next to my computer is conclusive proof."

You can see the current world splay highscore table by following this link - http://www.dbhut.com/splat.php