Ie Fight for Ie Churnal - Part 1

The last few days have been quite unsettling here at the offices of Ie Churnal. As you are aware, our blog was hijacked by a rather unsavoury, leather codpiece-clad bloke going by the moniker Roy Anarchy. His assertion that Tony was a wuss seemed spot on as Roy's appearance coincided with our so-called leader vanishing in our time of need. Only Jonathan and new staff members Seamus and Maria were brave enough to defy Roy's new 'punk only' policy.

Uneasiness gave way to alarm when an eerie resemblance between Roy and Tony was noted. Also, whenever Roy left the office for a slash, Tony would appear, fists in the air shouting 'Put em uuuuup, p-huut em uuuuup' in a breathless, cartoonish way. This continued for much of Saturday but eventually by way of a flurry of post-it notes left by Tony and Roy, a time and a place to settle the matter was arranged... Noon on Sunday at the Ie Ulpster haberdashery.

Eager for a conclusion to this unpleasant episode, Ie Churnal staff and hordes of fans gathered inside the shop (OK, I exaggerate... Ie Churnal staff and Jade). Anyway, at 12 o'clock sharp Roy came bursting in through the back door... 'Where is heeee!! Oi'm gonna punch 'is teeth so far down 'is throat that he'll whistle when he farts', and with that started checking behind the drapes, curtains and rolls of fabric in search of Tony.

Did Tony turn up? Did he fight? Find out soon!

TO BE CONTINUED...