Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Fight outside local kebab shop (cont)

Hi readers, its Aaron here ready to continue my honest account of the amazing fight I was lucky enough to witness recently, Uncle Nick versus Uncle Jim. I left off previously at a point where Uncle Nick was clinging around Uncle Jim's waist like a vicious Koala bear. Meanwhile Uncle Jimmy was staggering around causing the crowd to part in front of him as he lurched here and there.

It appeared that Jimmy was struggling with something in his hand, which I then saw was a pint of beer he was finishing off and must have taken out of the pub with him earlier. Finally he swigged down the last few dregs of beer, smashed the glass down on the pavement and then roared again, 'come aaan then ya baaastaaaaaahd!' and started blindly swinging his fists around but only connecting with air.

Jim then seemed to realise that his tormentor was actually clinging around his waist and not standing in front of him and aimed a punch directly at Uncle Nick's head. Unfortunately for Jim, Uncle Nick managed to dodge the punch which landed directly on Jim's own stomach. Groaning in agony Jim doubled up, at which point Uncle Nick finally released his grip and kicked Jimmy square in the shin.

Ever the sportsman, Uncle Nick then stood back to allow Uncle Jim time to regain his composure, which only took a few seconds. Jimmy lurched forwards and with amazing speed and accuracy managed to land a punch square on the side of Nick's head. For a moment Nick's knees wobbled and his eyes glazed over but he was able to recover quickly and land his own punch directly on Jimmy's groin. Uncle Jimmy squealed in agony and lashed out with a kick which connected beautifully with Uncle Nick's shin but the pain in Jim's groin from the hit he had taken previously was still causing him immense pain. Uncle Nick sensed his chance for victory and ducking and weaving landed a couple more straight jabs again to Jim's groin. This was too much for Jim who crumpled up in a heap clutching his crown jewels and moaning softly.

To be honest I was a bit disgusted by the way Jim had behaved in this fight, my suspicions appeared to be confirmed that he was a dirty fighter who fights like a girl, I went over to congratulate Nick who as always had behaved impeccably and bought him a pint to celebrate his impressive victory.

See part 1 here

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Y'naa worrit it is! Ye cannit take wor jimmy neewhere!

Anonymous said...

PS if I was clutchin me croon jewels I widna be moaning SOFTLY!!!! jimmy