Letters to the Editor

Sir,
A word of warning to your readers regarding Ade's tip on telling right from left. I myself thought I could improve on his tip and tied a bit of string to the steering wheel of my car. I found that when I turned the wheel, to navigate a corner for instance, I got a false string reading and ended up hoplessly lost.
Yours Nikos

Nikos, you should have stuck with the tip as described, there are no short cuts. However, in an emergency the following tip has got me out of many a tight spot. Always turn towards the sun, that way you are always turning right, probably. (Note, this is only good for datytime). - Ed

Dear Sir,
Why is it that you have to read each separate article in this blog backwards, but the actual article forwards? It's doing my head in.
Yours Mr W.W. Dubbleyew

Well W, it's to help those in the other hemisphere to make sense of the stories, whichever hemisphere you are reading this in I can assure you it's more logical in the other. - Ed

Sir,
I never tie string around any of my wrists, ankles or other bodily extremities (except for one) and yet 50% of the times I guess the way to go I get it 100% right ;-)
Regards,
Michael De Candlestick

Hmm 50% of the time I guess the way to go I get it wrong 100% of the time, I suppose we should get together. - Ed

Dear Baeky,
I often find that my letters and emails get sent to the wrong recipient. Is this the fault of the USA government or maybe irresponsible hackers could be responsible? I wish that whoever is responsible can be punished please. I authorise you to do the necessary. Please delete this email once you have read and understood it.
Yours Sincerely,
Nick Buttros Dickos

I can see what your problem is, you are forgetting to put a postage stamp on your emails. Routers have feelings too and when you forget a detail like this they tend to spit the dummy out and route them incorrectly - Ed

Sir,
I wish to apply for the post of secretary at ie churnal offices, please note that I have big jugs is this an advantage? Pic enclosed.
Yours
Eswyl

I'm sorry, whan you can qualify your jugs with a valuation we will look again at your application. - Ed